If you see her, say hello

I think my husband expected that once we had a kid I would suddenly bond with the wives of his friends because we were all moms.

While I talking about MY kid, it’s not really a bonding point to talk about parenting. It’s small talk, and I still find small talk extremely painful.

What do I enjoy talking about?

• Photography: scenes, kit, styles, setup, tops, post editing. I’m learning so am in that sponge phase.
• Web stuff – I work in this so that’s a no brainier. From apps, to their marketing, business models, strategy, branding, websites, or just discussing on web culture related topics like : the culture on mastodon vs twitter. Instagram vs TikTok content.
• Any vampire, witch or other supernatural (preferably not too gore heavy or sad- YA is the sweet spot) media. I’m currently binging the Mayfair witches and the rebooted interview with a vampire on prime.
• Writing. If you want to flesh out or riff an idea I’m always game. I love developing new plot lines or alternate universe plot lines of whatever fanfic someone is into.
• Psychology and behaviour research papers. I love how studies are always elucidating or testing out popular self help advice. For example: after telling women for years that the reason there was a pay gap is we just don’t negotiate salary while men do, the data shows that the reason we don’t ask is cos when we do we get seen as greedy or entitled. Almost we picked up on what society will or won’t allow us to do. Almost like there’s a double standard. This sort of data will continue to evolve as society does, but that’s all the more reason I find these sorts of studies fascinating.
• Planning. Like so many people with adhd, I have only two modes: utter time-blind chaos, or the most elaborate and methodological planning system ever. And I’m always eager to talk to fellow planners.

So, ask me what I think of web 3 (but only if you’re willing to listen. I hate being asked a question that’s only there to allow the speaker to info dump without engaging with what I’ve said), your latest fanfic or dnd campaign you’re planning, a photoshoot your thinking of, or Notion vs todoist — these are all better ways to engage me than asking about the latest celeb drama, GoT spin-off or cinematic release, or how much screen time I’m comfortable with.

I know it’s limiting to not talk of things that exist in the physical world like yoga class, or cinema or concerts. But I’m still in the phase of falling asleep exhausted by ten pm.